Not all gratitude is created equal.
I can say thank you to a Lyft driver or a cashier at Trader Joe’s, but what do I say when my mother gives me valuable advice?
Or when a friend saves me from making a blunder? Or sends me a compliment for something I wrote?
Or when I’m grateful for being alive?
Can saying thank you work for all occasions?
When a word becomes ubiquitous, it no longer feels alive. It may be accurate and appropriate, but it’s stale. Almost cold.
I find that is the case with thank you. I’ve noticed that I rarely settle for those two words.
If I’m on text, at minimum I will add a little something warm, like “thank you, my friend.”
If I’m deeply grateful for what someone has done, I will try to elaborate and express how much the act has meant to me.
If someone brings a gift, I never say “you didn’t have to.” Of course they didn’t have to. I will show gratitude and refer to the gift.
If a friend shares a good idea on the parsha of the week, I will go out of my way to thank them and explain why.
When it comes to gratitude, I can’t do stoic.
When I meditate in the mornings to express gratitude to God, I make sure to include a long list, from being able to breathe to being able to write as I wish.
Gratitude is not just a well-known tonic for happiness; a way of appreciating life’s many blessings.
When we’re grateful towards the people in our lives, it’s also a reminder that we are not independent souls living on our own islands. We are dependent souls who need one another to lead meaningful lives.
Some people like to curb their expressions of gratitude, so as not to look as if they “owe” something in return.
But gratitude is not something to view through the cold lens of leverage. At its deepest, gratitude is a recognition that we are not alone, that life is a lot more than “owing nothing to no one.”
Gratitude is the glue that keeps us connected to our blessings and to one another.
For that, I can’t say thank you enough.
Shabbat shalom.
