“The First Time I Understood ‘Merry Christmas’”

Science and Health

Dear all,

Growing up, I often felt awkward when someone wished me “Merry Christmas.”

Do I gently explain that I don’t celebrate?

Do I reply with “Happy Holidays”?

Do I simply say “Merry Christmas” back and move on?

For years, there was no answer that felt quite right.

Ironically, it wasn’t until I spent a year living in Israel that I truly understood what people mean when they say “Merry Christmas.”

Not because I visited Bethlehem.

Not because of an interfaith gathering or a shared holiday meal.

But because every Friday afternoon, something remarkable happened.

As Shabbat approached, strangers on the street—Jews, Muslims, Christians, people of every background—greeted one another with the same words: Shabbat Shalom. For that moment in time each week, the entire country seemed to pause. Time softened. We were swept up in a collective awareness that something sacred was arriving.

No one was asking what I believed.

No one was testing my observance.

They were simply sharing joy.

That’s when I understood: this is what “Merry Christmas” is meant to be. Not a statement of theology, but an offering of goodwill. A small human gesture that says, “May this moment be meaningful for you.”

Do I still sometimes pause when the greeting comes my way? Yes.

But now, I hear it differently.

I hear joy reaching outward.

And I honor the intention behind it.

With love and Shalom,

Rabbi Zachary R. Shapiro